Today is day 23 of the #LoveBlog challenge and the prompt is “family.” To see all the prompts for the rest of the month, check out Brita’s introductory post.
I thought a lot about what I wanted to write about my family. There is just so much to write and I could have taken it in several different directions. But since I’m trying to stay focused on marriage here, I thought I’d share some lessons I learned from my parents about marriage. They are such a great example of a loving and lasting marriage, how could I not?
You may also like 5 Lessons My Parents Taught Me.
Table of Contents
10 Lessons my Parents Taught Me About Marriage
- ONE || Always put God first
I think putting God first in your marriage can look a little different for different couples. For my parents, it looks like going to church every time the doors open unless there is a legitimate excuse. It also means praying together, studying scriptures together and talking about spiritual things. It means teaching their kids to love the Lord and follow Jesus’ example.
- TWO || Be in constant communication
My parents tell each other everything from what they had for lunch to their deepest emotions. And they always listen too. One thing that will always stick with me is how my dad always called home when he was leaving work. Even before cell phones. Or if he was going to be late, he’d call and tell mom that as well. It wasn’t because she made him call or that she had to know where he was at all times. It was out of respect for her. So she wouldn’t have to worry about a car accident and she could plan for dinner and whatever else we had going on that day.
- THREE || Ritual and tradition are important
My dad buys my mom a new Coach purse every Christmas. They’ve made a tradition of visiting Pearson and me every October. They have sort of made a ritual of renting a red box movie every Friday. And of course they have their weekly shows they have to watch. I’ve witnessed these strengthen their relationship. It’s something about having that routine. Being able to depend on it is very comforting. But don’t think for a second that they’re boring, they are spontaneous too!
- FOUR || Eat dinner together as much as possible
This is something that my parents really found important. Obviously, there were times when it just wasn’t possible. But for the most part, we ate dinner as a family around the kitchen table every night. When I found out that a lot of other families don’t do this every night, I was very surprised. This was our family time. We talked about what happened that day and our plans for both the near and distant future. A lot of my childhood memories happened around the table. It was a staple in our every day starting from when we were babies and still happens today whenever I go home. I’ll admit though, Pearson and I could be better about this one and eat dinner at the table more instead of on the couch in front of the TV.
- FIVE || Always support each other
Through job changes, illnesses and ailments, big life decisions, dealing with rude colleagues and much more, my parents have always supported each other. They show support by helping in any way they can, by vocalizing how proud they are of each other, and generally agreeing with and choosing to support each other’s decisions.
- SIX || Have fun together
As I mentioned before, my parents have a tradition of coming to visit us every October. And yes, we are a ton of fun to hang out with, but they never just drive to Ohio and back. The first year they came, they stayed in Lexington and saw the horse parks and on they way back they went through West Virginia to the Blue Ridge Parkway. The second year they did the same trip but they brought my grandparents with them. The next year they visited Pittsburgh while they were up here and this year, the went on to Chicago after staying a few days with us. They certainly know how to have fun together and make the most out of a vacatio.
- SEVEN || Respect each other
My parents always respect each other. They’re kind to each other. They respect each other’s wants. They never talk bad about each other to other people. At least not that I’ve heard. They respected each other’s decisions and neither of them ever tried to force decisions on each other.
- EIGHT || Forgive
My parents are human. And they’re not perfect. They mess up. But they always forgive each other. It may not come easy and it may not happen immediately, but they always forgive each other eventually. It’s so detrimental to any relationship to hold a grudge, but especially to a marriage!
- NINE || Choose to love each other no matter what
My parents were the first people to show me that love is a choice. A lot of people think love is just a feeling and that once the feeling is gone, the relationship is over. That is so not the case. Love is a choice and my parents continue to make that choice every day. Marriage is hard. They’ve gone through tough times just like anyone else. But they’re determined to endure together!
- TEN || Live within your means
My dad is the nerdiest guy I know when it comes to finances and saving money. So he instilled in me from an early age how important it is to save and be smart about your money. He and my mom always kept an open dialog about finances. They never wanted for anything, but they never spent more than they had. They’ve lived with virtually no debt for as long as I’ve been alive. They had student loans that they paid off quickly and they have a mortgage, but that’s it!
So you see, my parents were great examples for my marriage. I know I’m very lucky in that regard and I just had to share today for the #LoveBlog!
What lessons did you learn about marriage from your parents?
Thanks for reading!
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Meet Brita Long: Christian feminist blissfully married to Dan Fleck for almost two years. Lover of Paris, pink sparkles, sensible shoes, manicures, and books. Fueled by hot tea and mimosas.
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Meet Charlene Maugeri: Christian, wife, fur-mom, nerd, blogger and much more! She uses her blog, Enduring All Things, to inspire young wives to keep God first and their husbands second in everything they do.
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Great lessons here Charlene. There is so much we can learn from our parents’ marriages– after all, they’ve lived it through so many years, so we can get great tips from them. Especially agree with #s 2, 8 and 10. My husband and I had a long-distance relationship for 5 years and constant communication was the key to us staying together. Thank you for sharing!
That’s so true! We can learn so much from them. Thanks!
Great lessons here, Charlene. There are many wise lessons we can lear from our parents’ marriages. Especially agree with 2,8, and 10. My husband and I were in a long distance relationship for several years before we got married, and constant communication was the key to us staying together. Thanks for sharing!
These are such great lessons. I think the only one that applies to my own parents is eating dinner together but I think that’smore To do with Italian customs and my father not being a good cook than the strength of their relationship. The TV is always on etc. I think they’ve always lived as co-parents who happen to be married and not people who really wanted to be married to each other who happened to have kids, if that makes sense…
That does make sense. And it’s kind of sad to me but it looks like they’ve raised great kids!